No Reservations

Anthony Bourdain:

Chef turned celebrity-chef who gives it his all not to make fun of Rachael Ray and Rocco DiSpirito every 15 minutes and even then it’s just not good enough. Host of the Travel Channel show “No Reservations” which I can’t get enough of. In a nutshell he travels around the world [without having to learn a lick of the language spoken in that country] and meets with in-country hosts to try the regions best food. The one-hour show is a fun and enlightening view of places I have never seen and may very well never see in person. Most of all, it’s about food and travel, perfect combo.

Bourdain appreciates eating barefoot almost as much as he loves eating pig and drinking beer. As strange and true as this description is, it’s not even appropriate to share the kinds of things I would sacrifice for that man. Of course I’m obsessed with him; he’s the older guy, the restaurant-type, the writer, the world-traveler. And most of all, the bad boy. Alas, the bad boy. Like a Batman band-aid, it seems so bad-ass, not matter how old you are, but then, of course, it doesn’t last and disappoints you and you realize you should’ve ripped it off and tossed it into the bottom of the dumpster yesterday. And even though we see this coming, it’s as though we feel we NEED to make this bad decision to rack up some life experience. We flip the switch of common sense to “OFF” and realize when it’s too late that we’ve totally cut the power! Or, so maybe it’s just me.

Or WAS me. Not anymore, I’ve racked up enough “life experience” in that department and my diploma is signed by the Deans, me and God. I have received many compliments from girl friends of mine who say they wish they could be straight-forward like I am, or not be bothered by certain things, or just tell a guy what I think. And I appreciate that, because I’m glad the girls who care about me approve of such qualities. But those are not easy to always uphold and even a girl who is straight-forward still WISHES the guy would call her. Yup, that jerk who screwed her over 2 weeks ago and then again last week. But temporary is not worth your time. YOU are worth your time. And someone else will be, the right person. Someone who will understand that he must EARN it and who will know that all relationships are partnerships.

GUYS: ALL relationships are PARTNERSHIPS. That includes friendships. I can name a handful of guys who I was once great friends with whose names now make me roll my eyes. Not [necessarily] because they met some other girl (or got married), but because I felt disrespected on a constant basis, even at a friendship level. My current incessant distrust of men stems from friendships with males going sour. It goes beyond that but roots grow deep and it takes more than one person to get to the bottom.

I don’t hate men and I love all my friends, male and female. But what I used to take with a grain of salt, I now take with a tablespoon. Or a whole sack. Or two.

Oh, you thought this would be about some celebrity-chef obsession? So did I…